Hi, and welcome. This blog has changed a bit recently. My husband and I fought through 4 consecutive losses to get our second healthy child (born in December 2012) . . . and while we had not shut the door on the idea of another pregnancy, we certainly were leaning in that direction. On August 8, 2014, we found out we are pregnant for the 7th time. A total surprise. So the neurotic journey continues . . . third child or fifth loss . . . I'm scared and confused and just a teensy bit excited . . .

Wednesday, January 4, 2012

I just want 2011 to go away . . .

Sigh. A small part of me hoped that saying goodbye to 2011 would mean saying goodbye to the pain that came with it. Nope. The pain is still here. Lots more friends either having their babies or announcing their pregnancies and it's no easier for me than it was a week or a month ago.

After telling my husband's family about our problems over Christmas, we decided it was time to really come out to everyone. Our personal blog and facebook made that a fast and relatively easy process. (Easier than talking about it in person, that is for sure.) So everyone knows now. And that doesn't make me feel better either.

I'm desperately searching for something that will lessen this pain - and I can find nothing. Nothing makes me feel less broken or less empty. Nothing.

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