Recurrent Pregnancy Loss: Sad

Wednesday, February 15, 2012

Sad

I don't know why, but my soul hurts today. I haven't had a day like this in quite a while. I'm guessing it's PMS hormones, but whatever it is . . . it sucks.

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Our Fertility Timeline

August 2014 - Betas: 8/12=135 (~13-17dpo), 8/14=433 (~15-19dpo)

August 2014 - PREGNANT (#7)! A big surprise.

December 2012 - 36w3d Our healthy son ("Boy 2") is born a month early via c-section (my water broke and he was breech).

August 2012 - Anatomy scan reveals a healthy and normal (albeit already large) baby BOY! No signs of any neural tube defects whatsoever. A 26 week ultrasound is scheduled for October just to double check everything and keep an eye on other possible causes for the abnormal 16 week bloodwork.

August 2012 - Phone call from doctor after 16 week bloodwork indicates high risk for a neural tube defect. More testing is required.

August 2012 - Stubborn baby hiding behind anterior placenta = a doctor who couldn't find a heartbeat at 16w6d. Ultrasound reveals all is still well. (Except for the minor heart attack mommy had waiting to get that news.)

July 2012 - NT scan at 12w0d is PERFECT! Baby measuring 6 days ahead and looking great. Risk of trisomy disorders significantly reduced.

June 2012 - Fourth ultrasound (9w2d) shows perfect growth over the last 2 weeks. Baby measuring 9w0d. Heartbeat is great. Cervix looks great. Sac looks great. Placenta is developing well.

June 2012 - Third ultrasound (7w2d) reveals embryo measuring 7w0d and a fetal heartbeat of 144bpm.

May 2012 - Second ultrasound (6w2d) reveals embryo measuring 6w3d and a fetal heartbeat of 121bpm. Beta 31dpo=36,818.

May 2012 - First ultrasound (5w2d) reveals gestational sac, yolk sac, and very beginning of a fetal pole. Beta 24dpo=10,801.

May 2012 - Betas: 15dpo=386, 17dpo=846

May 2012 - Cycle 11 = PREGNANT (#6)!

April 2012 - Cycle 10 = negative.

March 2012 - Cycle 9 = negative. (Probable chemical pregnancy, but not 100% sure.)

February 2012 - Cycle 8 = negative.

January 2012 - Sonohysterogram shows no uterine abnormalities. RPL results all normal. Start TTC again.

December 2011 - Period returns 12/19. RPL bloodwork 12/21.

November 2011 - Betas: 11/8=9,000, 11/15=2,900, 11/17=490, 11/23=37.5. Last beta is low enough that I don't have to go back for more bloodwork. I will monitor at home via home pregnancy test. Should be negative in a couple weeks. Currently all signs point towards a completed miscarriage.

November 2011 - Natural miscarriage seemingly occurred 11/15 (9w5d), but did not complete. Hopefully completed 11/18 (10w1d), but waiting on blood work to confirm.

November 2011 - Ultrasound @ 8w5d, heartbeat is gone. Sac is detaching. (Loss #4)

October 2011 - Ultrasound @ 7w4d, WE HAVE A HEARTBEAT! (~130bpm) But baby isn't positioned for good measurements - and may be measuring behind.

October 2011 - Betas: 10dpo=12.5, 12dpo=65, 16dpo=484, 18dpo=954

October 2011 - Cycle 7 = PREGNANT (#5)!

September 2011 - Cycle 6 = negative.

August 2011 - Midwife mandated cycle off.

July 2011 - Started acupuncture.

July 2011 - On the day before my appointment with my midwife, a test comes up curiously negative. Period starts several days late. Chemical pregnancy. (Loss #3)

July 2011 - Cycle 5 = PREGNANT (#4)!

June 2011 - Bleeding starts several days after positive pregnancy test. Chemical pregnancy. (Loss #2) Schedule appointment with midwife, but am told I don't need to wait a full cycle to try again.

June 2011 - Cycle 4 = PREGNANT (#3)!

May 2011 - Cycle 3 = negative.

April 2011 - Cycle 2 = negative.

March 2011 - Cycle 1 = negative.

February 2011 - Start TTC our second child.

July 2010 - No heartbeat. Natural miscarriage ~ 8 weeks. (Loss #1)

May 2010 - Feeling oddly pregnant, I take a test. PREGNANT (#2)!

December 2009 - Our healthy son ("Boy 1") is born.

April 2009 - Cycle 1 = PREGNANT (#1)!

March 2009 - Start TTC our first child.